Friday, May 16, 2008

Prestonwood Baptist Pervert Minister Going To Hell (if there is such a place)

I'll go ahead and get this out in the open right now: I'm not a big supporter of organized religion. There. I said it.

With that disclaimer out of the way, I'll proceed.

You've seen those "mega-churches" right? You know, the monstrosities built on 10 acres that have restaurants, spas, & sports facilities that rival the new Cowboys stadium? Yeah..those. They bug the living shit out of me. Living in the "bible belt," as its called, subjects me to all kinds of wacky, overly religious jackasses. Worse still are the give-me-your-money-or-else-you-can't-be-saved scammer evangelist-types like Robert Tilton, Benny Hinn, etc. I can't stand any of it or any of them because I think it's all bullshit.

So, more than a decade ago when the Prestonwood Baptist church (a.k.a. relig-o-mall) was being built, I was bummed because it was being constructed right in my neck of the woods. Then the inevitable happened and all-too-many people I knew started attending church there because the damn thing seats about 400,000 on Sunday mornings. Oh, how they loved it there, too.

"That place is amazing," I'd hear.

"The ministry is so down-to-earth and they really take care of their members," they'd croon.

Then the worst, "I just LOVED that sermon on Sunday! Matt, you gotta hear this guy speak...he'd change your mind."

After washing the vomit out of my mouth, I'd move on with my day.

Why am I so cynical about this?

Case in point: today one of the ministers from that very church was arrested for trying to have sex with what he thought was a 13 year-old girl. Yup...drove 3 hours from shiny Plano down to Bryan with a box of rubbers in hand.

ARE YOU FUCKING KIDDING ME??

Church? Pffft. It'll teach your kids great values, huh? Barf.

Tell me I need to attend church to save my soul and I'll tell you what a ridiculous joke I think you are.

It's way too dicey and I'm not that much of an asshole to be outspoken about religion regularly. It's none of my business and I typically respect everyone's right to do whatever it is they choose. I certainly do what I want, so why shouldn't everyone else? Just because I don't buy into any of that crap doesn't mean I'm right...it's just my opinion.

And just to set the record straight, I'm not just an uninformed dipshit with a big mouth. I have an older brother who graduated from Harvard and is a Rector at an Episcopal church in the northeast...and has been for many years. Yep..he's a priest. And he's the smartest person I've ever met and I have more respect for him than he'll ever know. And just because I don't share his "affinity for divinity," I think the world of the guy and would lay down in traffic for him without hesitation. He's my big bro.

But, man, I was so disgusted with this story that I had to vent. Thankfully nobody really reads this blog.

Hey, Joe Barron, I'll see you in hell...if there is such a place...